29 March, 2011

I just changed Coriolis into a heart shapped majem:

I have this oceanography test in about two hours.
I can pretty much say, and not be ashamed of, I know nothing for this test.
My 9:45 class was canceled today, but good thing on my way out I found Ceasar and
we spent about an hour or so chit chatting about life, death (Emily Dickinson) music, and chill Brits.
We later got trapped in the building, and couldn't find an exit for a few minutes (we were taking pictures and running from security when we went through a wrong door).
There's no way that I'm going to understand what's going on with oceanography -- after being inspired so much and having laughed as hard from our conversation.  I love people like that -- just super creative and full of energy.  I feel like we've been friends for ever haha.
But yea, going back to Coriolis.  In layman's terms, Coriolis is the way in which the winds move on Earth, meaning on the Westerlies, Northwesterlies, etc - basically the change of winds is explained in a six-cell circulation model.  The two main wind movements sit right in the middle, instead of learning (memorizing) how these winds move and why, I decided that I would remember them as "just thing about it like this, in the middle of the Earth, there's a giant heart that ends to the left with the circular top in the middle".  What the fuck kind of shit is that?  How is it that a grown person, about to graduate, and embark in a trip of a life time (within the next few months) thinks about a science with heart shaped graphs and simplified emotions painted in the walls of my mind.

Am I right to be mad at myself for not being more serious, I guess with my life?
It's always, Carpe Diem, and I do what I want, and for fuck sake just life your life-
but have I gone overboard??

I'm just really confused I think, and after I finish creating what I said I would -
I'll overcome this frustration.  I'm sure.

I was thinking about facebook.  I don't know what to do about it now.  I don't want to go on it -
sign up like another loser, part of the system -- but I want to put all my things in one place where I can see my friends all the time.  I want to take my artsy photos, I want to write about music, and I want to expose on philosophy as much as I can - and at the same time I want an audience.  I want, even if it's one person - one of my friends to see my art (what I put up of course, not like my private material) BUT I REFUSE TO BE PART OF THE SAME OLD MAINSTREAM SYSTEM.  I don't know what to do.  I'm gonna end up going crazy.

I want to get so many things - and I really need a job.
But how can I get a job when I barely have time to sleep?
Maybe I should just reorganize myself better.  I need to replan my life, and keep a strict schedule.
Kind of like how Mr. Ratburn explained in an Arthur episode.
You see? there I go again - over simplifying everything, acting like I'm 9 or something.
I need to get my shit together, and get it together fast.

Tonight, I'm working on my magazine - no ifs, ands, or buts.

No comments:

Post a Comment